Re-editing Dielli’s Story

I took 21 pages out of 72 pages of work. That means the story moves quite a bit faster. Most of what I took out, over half, was Uncle Toban’s story. Sometimes in Lackey’s books, the appendix includes works referred to in the novel. I know I always like to read those, though sometimes they aren’t as good as what I imagined. So maybe the stories can go in there. Or maybe some can go in each one.

I wanted to write the poem of Uncle Toban, but that’s a lot of hard work and I’m not that good a poet. Maybe I could try it again later, though. If I get stuck on a section of the novels.

My brother called and asked what I was doing. Then he asked wasn’t I already supposed to have sent that out again. When I explained he asked, “Didn’t you know it was slow before?”

I guess that’s why he didn’t tell me what he thought of it. He didn’t like it because it was too slow.

I’ve taken out 75 pages now. I have edited the slowest parts so that they go at a faster clip. But there are places that are still too slow. I’ll keep looking at them.

I’m trying to get the slow parts winnowed and yet keep the good and the flavor of the story. I was trying to have every other chapter be fast, but I still have three places where two chapters are slow with worldbuilding. Two sets are right before and right after the first major climax, where Dielli is removed from her home for doing good. The last set is right before the conclusion, which is fast, fast, fast. (Three chapters that move at quite a clip.)